This summer has proven itself to be a whirlwind. It is so funny to think back on what has brought me here – a decision to go to a recruiting event at A&M last fall. I didn’t have to go. Honestly, I remember myself going back and forth that evening. It would have been quite nice to stay home for once and maybe catch up on a good book and get to bed early. But as I usually do, I decided to go for it – you never know the types of impacts these little things can bring about.
So I went. I met some incredible people. One thing led to another, and I landed an internship in Houston for the summer. It has been so much fun to watch this path unfold – one step at a time. God really is so full of surprises (more on that to come later)! In the past month, I’ve been to Los Angeles for training and also have been placed on a project in Austin for the majority of the work week. I feel like I’m constantly flying or driving somewhere. Saying I’ve spent tons of time traveling is an understatement, but I can’t complain. I love seeing new places, meeting new people, and catching up with friends and family through phone calls on the road between Houston and Austin. My life is always on “play” – rarely do I have time to pause, never can we rewind, and who wants to fast-forward? Life is too beautiful to miss a second of it. Even in the toughest times, I’ve come to find beauty in something. I’ve been really, really busy this summer and in a way different than I am at A&M. Through it all, the lesson we’ve all been taught of “taking in every moment” has truly been exemplified in my life. My body and mind are in constant motion – and that makes it even more important than ever for my heart to be grounded in the right place.
So this is definitely a harder thing for me to admit, but I think it is important to understand my story this summer. And I feel like it is something many people can identify with, so I’ll ask – and share my personal answer. Where does your identity lie? Do you pride yourself in things of the world or solely in the Lord? I try – I really do – to be humble. But we are human, and we are all selfish and prideful in the wrong things. Exhibit A: me. One of my worst faults is that I am afraid of failure. I want to know all that I can in order to be successful. I love to learn (which is good) but I also often attribute my ability to do that and retain it to myself (not ok… at all). So throughout my internship, I have been thrown into many situations way over my head. I am literally at the starting block in so many ways. And I love it. It’s one of those ways that God has drawn me closer to Him this summer. Often I have that wall of pride between He and I – and this summer, it has been once again, knocked down in so many ways. I love not knowing – because I am completely dependent on Him for guidance and knowledge and wisdom – it is such a blessing! I’ve loved all of the learning I have done this summer, but this time around – He gets 100% of the credit, and that is how it should be. We all need to be whipped back into shape and knocked off of our high horse at times. This summer has proven one of those times for me. The best thing about it all is how I’ve been able to grow. Spiritually, it has been a catalyst. Personally, I’ve learned so much about myself and who I really am and want to be! It’s an awesome collision of my desires and my abilities and struggles - and reminders of who has given me everything good and perfect and will walk with me through every step of my journey!
One thing I’ve been blessed with tenfold is community. I live (Thursday – Sundays J) with two incredible girls, Sarah and Holly. Holly is currently in Israel, and so last week Sarah and I tried out a church in The Heights. It was the most moving worship service I have ever been to. It’s so hard to explain these types of experiences, but take my word for it. Come to Houston, and I’d love to take you along! Life is crazy. It’s one day happy – one day tough. Days fly by – my calendar is a mess absolutely full of things to do for work. The one thing that I don’t want to do this summer is let my heart be overwhelmed by it all. It is imperative for me to know where my heart is. Know who holds your heart, and never let it be swept up by the insignificance of this world. One of my goals for this summer is to strengthen my own foundation – solely between me and God, with my family and friends, church community, roommates… the list goes on and on. I want in every moment, my heart to reflect His heart. As I grow, I want to make sure I’m growing on solid ground, walking with Him. Life may be a whirlwind, but isn’t there some sort of beauty in that? In not knowing what may come next, but letting the Lord hold your hand and guide you through it all? It is that dependency that we place completely in Him – the humility that soaks in our hearts – that makes a whirlwind beautiful.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not upon your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your path.” - Proverbs 3:5-6
- Jordan
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